Life
is in a mess now. I cannot do anything and is really frustrating! I hate it when I want things to work out but I simply cannot do anything to make it right. Probably Im just being kay-po that's why I cannot make it right? But they are my parents!!! As a child, of course I do not wish to see what's going on. Honestly is not healthy for our growing up process =__="
Family is always very important to me. Although I always say how much I hate HIM but I know deep down in my heart I somehow love him too. I hate to admit that I love him too because I do not think he deserves it. HER, needless to say, everyone know how much I love her. So, getting phone calls and messages about they quarrel or fight, is really saddening.
Just when I decided to give up and try to accept what's going on in my house, another thing pop out. Runaway from home. Wtf. Do you know how worried we are? At least let us know where you went! I just need to know you are safe!
Everytime when I am home, heard argument, I feel like tearing. Thinking what's wrong with you guys? If have to argue every single day, why make that decision in the first place? WHY? Do you know how much it hurts to see you cry?
I thought things work out pretty well, but is not. People said do not invovle ourselves in adult's matter. Ya I agree because somehow we are not them so we may not know what's actually going on. BUT, as a child, we are not outsider and can't be insider too. So what are we? Just stand there and observe how they quarrel? Pretend didn't hear any noise or sobbing? I cant!!! I just can't stand aside and do nothing. Even when I really do, I will throw tantrum at myself or Thebf. Why do I have to see and hear everything and yet I cannot do anything? Why must put me in this kind of situation? This minute you shared with me your thoughts and next minute you want me to forgive and accept it like nothing had happened. What am I? Robot that can forget with just a click on a button? I got no feelings at all?
Now, where are you? =(
Family is always very important to me. Although I always say how much I hate HIM but I know deep down in my heart I somehow love him too. I hate to admit that I love him too because I do not think he deserves it. HER, needless to say, everyone know how much I love her. So, getting phone calls and messages about they quarrel or fight, is really saddening.
Just when I decided to give up and try to accept what's going on in my house, another thing pop out. Runaway from home. Wtf. Do you know how worried we are? At least let us know where you went! I just need to know you are safe!
Everytime when I am home, heard argument, I feel like tearing. Thinking what's wrong with you guys? If have to argue every single day, why make that decision in the first place? WHY? Do you know how much it hurts to see you cry?
I thought things work out pretty well, but is not. People said do not invovle ourselves in adult's matter. Ya I agree because somehow we are not them so we may not know what's actually going on. BUT, as a child, we are not outsider and can't be insider too. So what are we? Just stand there and observe how they quarrel? Pretend didn't hear any noise or sobbing? I cant!!! I just can't stand aside and do nothing. Even when I really do, I will throw tantrum at myself or Thebf. Why do I have to see and hear everything and yet I cannot do anything? Why must put me in this kind of situation? This minute you shared with me your thoughts and next minute you want me to forgive and accept it like nothing had happened. What am I? Robot that can forget with just a click on a button? I got no feelings at all?
Now, where are you? =(
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