I Write, You Kaypo

Mine started off adventurous, followed by stress and emo.  Drove all the way to Tanjung Malim with colleagues to eat Fried Kuey Teow, Black Pepper soup beehoon and Hokkien Mee. It was good :) Before departing, my colleague's car battery died. We were busy asking for help at Shell station. Good experience haha! That was Friday. My Saturday wasn't good. Love the companion but the issue that we faced...we were basically quite speechless and helpless. We wished we are rich enough to just fly and buy the tickets ourselves. We troubled so many people that I think we need to be vegetarian for a month to repay wtf.  Our tools for the day! 4 phones + 2 laptops. If we were checking out deals on stock market, I bet we are millionaires now. Too bad we were finding solution to spend our hard earn money =___________=" Well, Sunday was a girls' outing :) Since I can't bare my black roots, is time to touch-up! Had lunch with long-time-no-see Jarli and Chye Li at h...

 ME! Was browsing through old pictures. Miss the happy smile! I was a happy person, somehow I lost that. Everyday I have to control my frustration and be a happy person, try to think on the bright side, keep telling myself that I'm a fortunate person...I have tried all ways to be happy. Although it does sound very easy to be happy but somehow is like mission impossible to me lately. I will not give up. I know I deserve better and will work hard towards it! I will have the happy smile soon :)

Yes, I wish I could just close my eyes and ears, run away for a long vacation.  A LONG LONG LONG VACATION. I should be appreciating my life now as I'm still breathing. I know, I know...but I'm not enjoying my life at all. So much so of "Go for your goals!", "Live your life like there's no tomorrow", "As long as you work hard, you can reach out to your dream". Well, I don't see that coming at all. A simple question, person A's dream is to travel around the world. He/she works hard to save money for the trip, but could he/she just leave the family and quit the job and start traveling? How many of you have the courage to do so? As for now, I really want to quit my job but I can't do it because I have debt to settle. Ahh...I don't know. I just don't like to work in the current company. I have been watching various dramas at office when boss is not around. I don't see any growth or experience gained from the current job...

I'm Speechless I used to be this talkative girl who talk about anything to anyone. I wonder how annoying I was. Over the years, the ups and downs in life have taught me expressing feelings may not be a good thing. Since then, I have learnt to shut my mouth and kept almost everything in my pee size brain. I know I have friends to turn to and they will be my listeners. Thank you but I felt weird to talk about my problems to friends whenever we meet. What can they do for you? Why spread the negativity thoughts to others when their initial thought was just to chill out with friends. However, I will express my feelings when I think is appropriate to bring it up. My pee size brain doesn't work very well with too many thoughts drowning it. So, at times friends still have to bare with my rantings about my...life. At home, I have lots of unsatifaction that I need to voice out but as I said, I learnt that nobody will ever give a damn. The popular question would be "Where do ...

I feel like writing. Login blogger and click on New Post. Stare at the blank space, start thinking what to put as title (which is always the hardest part for me) then the content. Out of the sudden, I forgot what I intended to write. But typing is all I want to do now so being the stubborn me, I will still crap something out. I had trouble sleeping last night. Tired mentally and physically, after rolling left and right for hours, I slept. Re-charging process is not going well. Many hours of sleeping doesn't help. Exercising would be the next option I guess. We read, see, listen to numerous things everyday, then develop own judgement and perception. At times, we don't understand why so and so will have certain thinking or decision. Probably we do know why but can do nothing. We complain when we have no choices, and we do so when we have many choices too. Decision making process is a tough one because we scared to make one that we will regret, cry over it and complain "If I ...

Curly or straight? I always always always have issue with my hair. Not knowing what to do with it. From to have fringe or not, have bangs, shoulder length, waist length to boy cut. Well, when you don't have a strong feature these are the problems you have to deal with wtf. Hair style is one thing, hair color is another headache factor. I am still confuse on what to do with my hair, fml!

在工作上，觉得好像怎么做都做不好。总是会有些问题出现，很清楚知道我不能控制问题几时会出现但是老板不是这么想的。他会觉得是你不尽力去做所以才有问题，中间就算穿插了一些因素他那会去管。 有时觉得很委屈，没有人指导一直都只靠一本handbook和当有不明白就一直问问题，但是试问那一个老板喜欢一直回答问题？当有问题出现，总需要一个承担所以有事发生就怪我。 知道这个社会是这样，去那里打工都一样。所以只可以在这里写一写心声抒发心情嘻嘻！ 或许是我笨，但我会努力。我还是相信努力的人会得到回报的，只是通常好人的回报来的比较迟哈哈！总好过没有吧 :P

Is March! Like early of the month because I will be busier in studio. Then mid-month starting to be sien because is pay bills period. I don't think I do well in Microeconomics paper today. Well, will focus on the upcoming paper. Feeling emo recently, ended up crying to sleep... Photoshop-ing some photos, will post it up soon :)

Hello people! I know I somehow abandon my blog again. But I do check my blog everyday just to see if there's any new comment. I think people start giving up coming except for my no1 fan :p can I have more fans? then I'll have motivation to blog. But then again, I should blog more to have more people to come n read? Is like the chick first or egg first theory haha! Today, the day where people busy doing last minute cleaning, preparation for cny and reunion dinner! My parenta decided to do it differently. They did the last min cleaning part and adding some spice to it, they quarrel! spicy enough? They always choose important days to quarrel. Not only the weather is hot, the atmosphere at home nw is hot too. Double hot and spicy like Mcd burger. This is one of the reason I don't like cNY. I love to spend time at home and with family IF there's no argument and long faces. Imagine you wake up to argument, what a way to spend weekend and big days right? Guess they ignored the...

over job searching. Most of my friends are working which make me even more gan cheong about getting a job by May 2010. What if I can't get a job? What's if I screw up the interviews? What if I get a job and boss thinks that I performing poorly and sack me? You know when you sit down and start thinking, all kinds of negative thoughts would strike you first. I know I always write negative thoughts in my blog. That's because this is the only space I can spill my negative thoughts. Have been telling people around me (especially people in studio) to be positive, motivate them merely because I don't want them to give up but improve. At times, is easier said than done. We all know this very well. The more I think of this, the more I can't show them I have negative thoughts! So I have to act like a person without problems, be as cheerful as I can. Turning myself into a motivator and buried all my problems and negative thoughts aside. At least people won't have the perce...

I don't know what to put as title. Guess, is time to update. Very emo from Monday. Don't feel like talking. Starting classes next Monday. This feeling sucks. Like Minni said, throw shoes at college wtf. Worrying about getting a job in May if I pass all 3 subjects *fingers crossed* What if nobody wants to hire me? What if I end up working as a clerk? T_T Bo reminded me that I have to start paying my study loan in April. FML. Still about worrying whether I can pass 3 freaking subjects, and getting a job. Seriously worrying :( It bothers me, to the level it becomes very disturbing. Ya so basically my life revolves around getting a job or not, that's the source of my future clothes, shoes, bags, and trips! Speaking of trips, I want/need/must go oversea this year. At least to Taiwan, if I'm rich enough, want to go Korea too! I really need to be a tourist. Somehow, I like to plan trip :) People, if you like or have interest in dancing, you are welcome to take up classes in Ra...

of 2009. I love end of the year because of my birthday, bo's birthday and also Xmas! But I became emo when I realise is the last month of 2009. Realise that I didn't achieve anything at all! Ok, I think I did. Travelling with friends to Bangkok probably is the only happiest thing happened this year. I am still working at Raydio, collecting fees, dealing with some small problems. Somehow I know I need a new job. I have been searching online for jobs actually. I am still into event company. I am stubborn to not simply jump in any admin job out there which I know I will not like it. There are lots of problems I am dealing with which I don't talk about it to anyone. I became a listener where I only listen and don't talk much. Became someone who only smile and nod while people are talking. Strangely I like it. I am spending my xmas eve attending my friend's wedding dinner. I wish I could spend xmas at Switzerland one day ^_^

I have sort of neglected my blog for no reason =___=" Somehow I think nobody reads my blog anymore. Sorry I have to maintain Raydio's blog and facebook, so I somehow ignored my blog and sometimes even my own facebook wtf. I did lots of research about Chang Sha and Gui Lin online. Emailed many people to ask for information. Somehow this trip was plan by ourselves with a little bit help from our China friend. Cut the crap and let the pictures do the talking. #1 In the airport van. Going to Gui Lin train station. #2 The van. #3 Along the way from airport to train station. New houses. #4 Real old one. I wonder anyone really live there. #5 Gui Lin train station!!! The van didn't stop at the train station. He stops somewhere nearby and we suppose to find the train station ourselves wtf. Luckily the locals were helpful and direct us correctly haha! From the information I got online, we suppose to catch 1pm train from Gui Lin to Chang Sha. The girl at the counter told me ther...

is in a mess now. I cannot do anything and is really frustrating! I hate it when I want things to work out but I simply cannot do anything to make it right. Probably Im just being kay-po that's why I cannot make it right? But they are my parents!!! As a child, of course I do not wish to see what's going on. Honestly is not healthy for our growing up process =__=" Family is always very important to me. Although I always say how much I hate HIM but I know deep down in my heart I somehow love him too. I hate to admit that I love him too because I do not think he deserves it. HER, needless to say, everyone know how much I love her. So, getting phone calls and messages about they quarrel or fight, is really saddening. Just when I decided to give up and try to accept what's going on in my house, another thing pop out. Runaway from home. Wtf. Do you know how worried we are? At least let us know where you went! I just need to know you are safe! Everytime when I am home, heard ...

because 阿桑 passed away. Very sudden that's why is shocking! Have been a while since I read her news. Should say I nearly forget her existence. Probably many do not know who is she. "Ye Zi" is her signature song. She has a very sad vocal which makes her stand out from other artistes. 你是一个会唱歌的天使！＝） ************************************************** When I read about people passed away of cancer, I felt scary. Why women have so many diseases? Life...so unpredictable! Really unpredictable till is scary...very scary =(

and you see me online, means Im at Cyber cafe. I seriously dont like to go Cyber Cafe because people smoke and scold vulgar words like nobody business. But when your loved one said once in a while must let him relax which means playing dota with friends then I have to give in. Why when I said to do window shopping, he complaints that leg pain, neck pain, here pain there pain? and I didn't realise he's not giving in? =_____=" Rugi liao, next time must scold him if he ever complaints! Because is just window shopping, not that Im spending his money. Crap again I know. I am so goddamn bored in CC that I must crap in my blog. Why guys like to play dota so much? WHY? Okay we girls like to shop but I bet shopping mall's environment is much more better than CC! Im pissed off by this guy who non-stop scold ccb for almost half an hour!!! Non-stop man! Like people need to drink coffee to stay awake and he needs ccb instead. WTF! Thebf said dont post his graffity pictures in my bl...

psychology internship. Checked out my result on Thursday and I was super surprised that I got an A! OMG~ I never score A for my psychology subjects and finally, finally, finally...I got an A for internship. I seriously felt that all the hard work and traveling are worth while now haha! *do the happy dance* As for Communication internship, result - unknown. I got a...bad feeling for it dont know why. Maybe a C for that? Of course Im hoping for A for all the hard work I did but sometimes you don't get what you hope for. I always remember this and fear to hope for anything. =/ Fortune teller said I will be sway this year. I know! I nearly lost my wallet twice in a month! Gosh..have to change luck as soon as possible. Temple trip soon! CNY CNY CNY...nothing to be excited about. This is my first year not buying any new clothes for CNY. I know I shouldn't simply spend a penny because of ___________. Another reason is I haven't get pay from camera fair lo. Should pay before CNY ma...

listening to Fish Leong's latest album. heard his voice. is really annoying. You dont know how much I feel like rushing in the room with a knife and stab him to death. I know I am sounding like a mad killer but I couldn't stand him shouting at you and you accepting it like is really your fault. What happened wasn't your fault so why are you swallowing all these? I know you "mm gam yun" thinking that all these years what you had done. But don't you think what you are doing now is so not worth it? Do you know how much it hurts when I heard you said those irrasional things? Is silly to think that way. Seriously. Yup you got nothing to lose but is not worth it! He don't deserve and you don't deserve to be treated this way too!!! Is really hard for me to hold back my anger. I just beh tahan people hurt you and I do nothing. Somehow I must help or not I will be very pek chek like how I am now. Can you please listen to us and just let him go? Just kick him ou...

Recently my posts are full of anger. Sorry I really can't help it. You don't know how nonsense can things be. You don't know why when you need an answer and you will never get it. You don't know why things can be so dramatic. You don't know why I am always asking why. wtf. My "You" here doesn't apply to anyone la. Just type it for fun. Too stress need to shout out. Worked at Mid Valley last 5 days. Fotokem's camera fair. I don't know why all my bosses are fussy people. Not ordinary fussy is SUPER fussy. I thought only women will be like that but this time man also same =______=" Anyway, all of them are unmarried so...can I conclude unmarried people around 40 and above can be very fussy? Other than fussy male boss (ya, must emphasize is man =_=" ) met awesome friends haha! I hope we got chance to work together next time! Met lots of people while Im working in Mid Valley. Fellest, Sherene, Lillian teacher! OMG can't believe she can ...

Because I knew her well enough and guess it right. I hate it when I guess something bad will happen and it really happen. I HATE THAT! Why cant I hope for something good and that really happen? Why only bad things? WHY? Getting back together sounds great to some people. And I don't know what's wrong with me that I can be so angry and sad about this. I even cried from Mid Valley to Klang. =_=" Since the incident happened, I didn't cry at all. At times, I do feel like crying but I don't think I should but to be tough and show support to her. Just when we gave her all the support, she has chosen to give up. I don't know where she gets the courage to put herself in the risk of getting hurt again. I don't know why she has to put herself in such situation. Worth it meh? I TOTALLY DONT THINK IS WORTH IT. I put myself in her shoe and think. Again, not worth it. People said love is blind. But I don't think this apply to her because she's rational. But...I do...